Oh Holy Molar
Sergeant Howie (Edward Woodward) cried at the end of The Wicker Man, “OH GOD, OH JEEEESUS CHRIIIST!” This is what was going through my head halfway through 'Oh Holy Molar's first song, 'The Bells': 'Oh god, oh Christ, is it going to be like this all the way through?' God texted me back immediately: 'Aye son, it is.'
'The Bells' did possess some melodic charm...some, but none of it coming from the words of Lucinda Chau (singer and piano player as well as cello operator, apparently). Her vocal style grated and when focusing on what she was singing about, namely quirky bullschtein wrapped up in middle class drama, I felt like washing down the entire contents of my well-stacked medicine cabinet (even the Ralgex) with half a bottle of gin. Has it really come to this? Lyrics about house prices?
Now, now. Don’t be like that. I did listen to the whole album, and it curdles blood like “A Serbian Film” in its horrific assaults, getting progressively worse as it goes on. You know what this style of music is being labelled as? Chamber Pop. Aye. Chamber Pop. What the fucking hell is that? I’ll tell you what it is: under-produced piano and guitar, tweeness splashed over everything and one whine-plagued bourgeois drama after another. Chamber pot more like, full of pish.
Kranky has acts I adore immensely on its roster, too many to name. Belong's 'Common Era' and Implodes' 'Black Earth' absolutely ground me every time I listen to them, so when I noticed Felix was on that label I had extremely high expectations. I find it bizarre a band this mince got picked up by them. Felix should be nuked from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
Posted: Tue 1 May 2012